Samantha and Cameron are all tucked snuggled in their beds... Katelyn is on her way to bed. We didn't do our traditional NYE family thing this year. We did watch a movie together, Percy Jackson and the Olympians something or other. Was a really good movie.
Christmas was so-so this year. Ok.. it was really GREAT for everyone else... but even with the kids smiling faces it was hard to feel the joy in my heart this year. Doug bought me a new Rebel T2i.. it's a cool Camera.. but Christmas this year was like faking an orgasm.. I smiled, said my Thanks, and couldn't wait for it to be over. I know I sound really horrible, but I don't know how to look forward to things right now. Every thing I would normally look forward to, I am instantly reminded that my mom won't be here to share in it with us. I really hope this passes soon... I am not living, just getting by for my kids and Doug's sake.
and my moms beloved Lab, Sabrina. She has been so heart broken without my mom. On Tuesday night, we had to put her to sleep. It was exactly 4 weeks to THE day that my mom had passed away.
Here she is at Christmas. She had lost over 40 pounds in a month. Barely eating at all.
The vets chalked it up to her being heart broken as well... she just missed her mom so much, she couldn't bare to go on. I held her in my arms and told her to say hi to Weiner (my shar pei who passed in Jan '10) and Mom for me. She was 12 years old. Great with kids. Helped babysit Katelyn when she was a toddler in my mom's backyard... she always caught Katelyn trying to climb over the fence back there. She and Weiner played together like little pups whenever they visited one another. I am having her cremated, and will place the ashes with mom.
I pray all my friends and family have a prosperous, happy and healthy new year in '11!
I am ready for the new year.. and then again I am not ready.